How to keep the fire

Lilla

 

 

 

After years of constant moving, finally, I could stop in Italy. Before, I had been changing place, country, apartment, role, profession, language. Attempting to recreate the bondless happiness of half year Erasmus in Firenze, my first definitive foreign adventure in 2012. Since then, only five years passed, but I feel like a marathon-runner, who has discovered precious pieces of her puzzle wherever she went.

I remember:

• the colourful bungalows of Whitstable, crispy seaside walks and biking, eternal green fields, white cliffs, the ample, majestic Canterbury Cathedral, my cat-ladys and all the supportive, nice people who were keeping me in line on my lonely hero’s journey, studying in England (… and last but not least, I remember the shortly deceased master chéf, RIP, Antonio Carluccio with whom I had a super short interview; his simple humbleness was a big honour and a real wow – as he said, the secret of good food and good life is using maximum 3-4 strong but likewise good ingredients);
• museuming, “flâneuring” and immersing ourselves in arts in that Parisian spring with my group of inspiring, international friends (… and of course, how could I forget our Hungarian-vegetarian-philosophical community and the first steps towards a sustainable  household? );
• trying to slow down and BUILD (numerous things, in so many areas, with the hope to improve and open up the world) in Hungary, while exploring more my motherland; commuting, hiking, volunteering, training, writing.

Since I was getting paid for working as a journalist and coordinating youth voluntary projects (asking, listening to and sharing amazing stories of amazing people), after a while, I got tired of  walking in my challenge zone and fighting. Because a lot of  times, I faced barriers difficult to overcome and tackle.

So the main reason behind my decision to apply for the EVS was to change perpectives, and share stories as a volunteer who lives, works, writes in Italy. (In most cases, about Italy, and till now, in most cases, to Hungarian readers in my weekly blog.)

Moving  worked out well for me. I am happy. And I believe, it is because you cannot feed a fire solely with fire itself. And so, if I were fire, this storyful reality would be my wood and air: the lands, the people, the work and the fact that in this EVS project I can not only collect stories, but experience, try, do and live through them! For instance, I will never forget the day when we started harvesting olives in the farm with locals. Hard to express how much I enjoyed every step. Likewise, our everyday activities make me glad: learning the language, personal and collective stories, about the past, regional history, good practices etc.

Back to track, in a nutshell, I was coming to this EVS in Italy hoping (that can seem a childish wish at first glance, but after all, that is really how it happened!) to find my heart, be able to balance, and keep the fire. Because, during this previous, intense, shifting period of my life, more or less, I had always found motivation, work, objectives, place to live, people caring about me and people about whom I cared. However, that little pulsing organ deep down, in the hustle and bustle, came too close to stop, and not to give a curious leap, not even hearing another new story again.  And for a storyteller, this is definitely not a good sign.

Till now, life proves me. My EVS project has given to me more positive things than I could ever dream about.  I am surrounded with great people who would catch me if I happen to fall. I learn something exciting and new every day. And important,  I found my heart. Or probably my heart has found me. We may never know the truth. But that is already another chapter of the story.